Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Fresh Eyes

Have you ever had one of those days where these are the thoughts going through your head?

If I get one more snotty nose wiped on my shirt, I will lose my mind.
I don't think I can handle another conversation with a 3 year old who is sure she is smarter than me.
I'm angry and I don't even know why.
One more act of disobedience and I will cry.  But why wait?  I'll just bawl my eyes out now!
I'm not cut out to be a mom.  I stink.  I'm failing my kids terribly.
Are we really bringing another kiddo into this chaos?  

No?  Me either.

Except on Sunday.  (and days before then that we just won't talk about). :)

Sunday was a rough one for me.  Both kids had been sick for days which is hard on many levels . . . they aren't their normal selves, we've been couped up in the house for too long, and we had to stay home from church.  It was a looooooong day!

By the end I was just emotionally drained and feeling awful.  Ava and I were a bad combination all day and had to apologize to each other multiple times . . . humbling for sure.  I knew that I wasn't walking in grace, but couldn't seem to get myself out of the funk.  I just kept blowing it.

So I naturally started with the anxious thoughts about how in the world I would be able to handle Easton in the mix.  O. VER. WHELMED.

I went to bed crying out to God for grace and for His new mercies to pour on me in the morning.  And you know what?  They did!  He is forever faithful and oh so good!

The last two days have been so much better . . . the kids are mostly back to normal, we've gotten out of the house, but most importantly my attitude has been drastically different . . . gracious and desiring to speak words of life to my kiddos.  What a difference abiding in Him makes!

I started a "school time" with Ava today.  We've really clashed when I've tried this before, but I have a new resolve to be intentional with her learning . . . whether she likes it or not.  Which she didn't.

She did great until the instructions were something that she didn't like.  Then she refused to obey and ran away from me.  Yikes.  She better be glad this didn't happen on Sunday . . . who knows how I would have handled it then!  But today I was supernaturally calm.  I disciplined her and reiterated the importance of following instructions instead of doing whatever you want.  Then she did it right!  When I asked later what she learned in school time she said, "To obey instructions."  At least she gets it for today!  I'll take that small victory!

This afternoon, Ava woke up from her nap asking for a sticker.  I said okay.  Here is what she came out with.  The two in her hands were on the bottoms of her feet, but she wanted them in the picture.  Love her!

And I've got to mention my little man!  He's starting to really communicate, which is both fun and frustrating.  The word he says most often is "hot" and he always does the hand motion like he is about to touch something hot and pulls his hand away.  So cute.  He doesn't say much else, so he says "hot" to all sorts of random things, hot or not!

How incredibly cute is this kid?!

But this cutie definitely has a temper!  He was so ticked at me for not letting him have my camera.

I love this one of the two of them too.  Just up from naptime and Ava was wanting a hug.  He was rightfully leery . . . her hugs usually end in him being tackled to the ground.  She better watch out though, He is only one pound behind her and I have a feeling he won't be offering a lot of mercy. :)

Kind of a random post, but I've just gone through some extremes the last few days . . . from being angry and discouraged to fresh eyes to see the blessings I have in my life.

Have you thanked God for His blessings poured out on you?  You should!

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